Just a couple of my poems, from the heart

I wrote the first one on September 30, 2022, after realizing that I can't find any hope in me, at this point. I will need a miracle from God, to not just give up on everything. That, is a, really scary, place to be. But, I've been through so much, and I'm tired, now. If there is any hope, at all, in my situation, it's my knowing that God has never failed me, and although, I am really 'war weary', right now, and the never-fulfilled Desire Of My Heart, truly, seems to be impossible, He's still, a loving, miracle-working, God. Because of THAT-- because of HIM-- I'm going to make it through, all, the trials and tribulations, I'm dealing with, now.

scene from a Hallmark movie

I was watching a HALLMARK movie.

While sitting there, I sighed.

"I have NO hope left," I whispered,

and then I began to cry.


I came across this next one while working on organizing my upstairs, which I've been, 'whittling away' at, off and on, for months, now. Now that, the weather, is cooler, I can be up there, alot, more, without, it being so, oppressively, hot, and stuffy. Hopefully, it will be done, soon, and that will be one less TO DO project, from my long list of such things. It is, slowly, transforming into a livable space.

I was raised being a 'TK'-- a teacher's kid-- until I was a freshman in high school. That, was when, we had to move away to another town, after my mother got her Master's Degree and was hired as an Instructional Supervisor for Hickory (N.C.) City Schools. I, had to go back to middle school, there, when we moved, because that was where the ninth grade was there. It was also in the middle of the school year, which made it both very hard to leave old friends that I had grown up with my whole life in Mebane (N.C.) and difficult to make new friends when alliances had already been formed. I, was,' the new kid'; the outsider, coming into that. It wasn't an easy adjustment at all, especially at that age. I have written poems my whole life-- ever since, I was about, the age of 8-- and I wrote the following one, the summer of my first year living there at the end of my ninth grade year. I was 15 years old, when I wrote this. My mother liked it, so much, that, she framed it, which, it still is, and hung it on the wall of her office in the Hickory City Schools Administration Building, until she retired. It was returned to me, after she died.

Only God Knows

Where the clouds seem to open to heaven,

In the midst of a pink-tinted sky,

I wonder if I'm really living,

And how it will be to die.

I look at the people around me

As they go on their way,

Living their separate lifetimes;

Living each present day.

Then I look at myself and I wonder

Just what I'll grow up to be;

It's so hard to know when you're young;

What will become of me?

Will I be happy and prosperous?

Will I have many friends and few foes?

I wonder, and yet, I always will,

For it's only God that knows.

                                        - Deborah G[ayle] Robinson

                                           July 31, 1971