Some Thoughts On My Spring Cleaning

It's been a busy week for me. Every week has been, for awhile now, but this one has had added elements specific to what we commonly think of as Spring Cleaning. Weather-wise, we have entered into Spring, this year, with the tentative progression of 'two steps forward; one step back', which left it feeling to me like a definite lack of commitment on Mother Nature's part. That caused me to feel uncommitted to it, as well, remaining longer in my Winter hibernation mode. We did manage to get green grass and beautiful buds, and without them ending up buried beneath more snow! Progress. Progress indicates there is some kind of purpose at work behind the evolving events. Some kind of plan. Once Spring has sprung, as they say, it brings with its arrival a renewed enthusiasm for my better organizing my home. Having the benefit of Spring's hope, emotionally, and its inspiration, mentally, goes a long way toward leading me in that direction. Along with that is my realization that this moment, each moment, is really all that there is. The ground just behind us has already crumbled into only a memory in our mind, while the terra firma of our future, before us, is expected by us but not promised to us, in that it hasn't even appeared as yet for us to step onto, in our pilgrimage; until it's there, and we step (or until we step, and it's there!). I personally don't know how anyone lives on this Earth without Faith, especially for their next step, which is really always into the unknown. It is the most solid thing to cling to in this illusory life. MY faith is in God. He has been the sole Being I have put my faith in Who has proven Himself worthy of that, from me. He does not disappoint! To KNOW Him is to KNOW that . . . . He is also the One Who both designed and delivered Spring to me!

Knowing what to hold on to in my life has been easier, for me, than my knowing what to make room for and allow in, in the first place. Had I done a better job at that, I would have ultimately spared myself these other, more difficult, decisions later on, regarding what to let go of. Every thing in my life requires a certain amount of time and energy, both finite resources, to engage with, and to maintain. Because we are emotional creatures, making the decisions about what to part with in our lives is not always as simple as one might wish they were. Sometimes, circumstances happen which take the decision out of our own hands completely. Sometimes that causes us sorrow. Other times it is simply a relief. Regardless, it is what it is. 'Cleaning house', either literally or figuratively (even spiritually!), opens us up to new possibilities. It can be hard to do, going in, but feels so good, to me, on the other side of it.

Sometimes we acquire, and keep, things in our lives for the wrong reasons. We obtained them simply because, at the time, we could, even though they didn't deeply resonate with our 'heart of hearts'. Other times, we bring something, or someone, into our lives because they gave us every indication, to the point of being virtually a guarantee, that they would be a wonderful addition, and even bring amazing things to our lives, in effect making it better, easier, happier. Our holding onto those, especially long after we have discovered for ourselves firsthand that what they seemed to promise us was never really the case, nor would it ever be, wastes precious time, and pointlessly takes up space in our lives, as we delay the inevitable of getting rid of them! Perhaps they can still find real purpose, and even be a good thing, in someone else's situation; but not our own. It's simply never going to happen, keeping them with us. It's time to let go.

Still other things have never been a good fit for us from the start, but we accepted them and allowed them in to the sacred space that is our lives, while knowing that fact, about them, all along, somewhere inside ourselves. Then we kept them in our lives, longer than we ever should have, for their perceived 'sentimental value'. We do this for reasons that were never really anything more than a reason in themselves, which is obvious once we finally allow ourselves to dig down to get to the heart of the matter. Emotionally untangling ourselves from the 'should' and 'if only' and 'maybe someday' messages that we tell ourselves about these things has to finally be faced up to, to set both, us, and them, free. Neither, was gaining anything positive, simply remaining tied together, with no progress, or purpose. There was no point. Setting ourselves free from one another gives both a chance to find where we truly belong. It may feel sad, in some silly way, but it is also exciting because NOW there is HOPE. To remain, as it was, created a hopeless situation, and no one and nothing should ever (have to) remain in that! Creations always come with the thought, and the hope, of them fulfilling their potential.

I called a charity, this morning, to begin the process of arranging for them to pick up my donations. I admit, I cried, a little, as I described how I had always so well cared for these items, and that they were 'like new'. I still knew this was the right thing to do, though; better for me and for them. These items look unused because they have been! They have moved with me wherever I have gone, for many years, and been washed, dusted, stored, set aside, and sometimes tripped over, by me, while basically being ignored. For various reasons, they haven't met my needs. Because they weren't right for me, they were never fulfilling their purpose which they were created for in the first place--- a real tragedy in itself, in this world, whether it is a human being or a bicycle! If someone or something isn't fulfilling it's purpose, then what is it here for, and what is it doing? It is here being unfulfilled; it is here not being all that it can be! They are not fulfilling their potential, and as a result of that, their worth is being diminished by this current situation, even though their actual value has never decreased. I am not enjoying them being in my life, either, and they were created to be enjoyed, and utilized, and experienced, by someone (else) who can do that with them. I keep thinking of how they look so new, but only because they have never had the chance to be fully engaged in what they were created for. Active interaction with Life brings chips, scratches, and flat tires, among other signs of wear and tear, to those things that are experiencing more of the fullness of this life.

These things feel like old friends to me, in a way, simply by being alongside me, as they have, physically, been, through all the things that I have been through. It is time, though--- well past time, actually--- for me to put them out of my life. They need to be sent away from me, so they can be sent toward something, toward someone, who can, and hopefully will, give them the life that they were created to have! I have found some things that I really needed, and have used, in thrift stores, in past years; especially during those years when I was destitute and money to purchase anything was almost nonexistent in my life. I found some real bargains there! It became one form of Treasure Hunting, for me. Not just because these items were affordable, but because they were exactly what I needed in my life! They were used, and enjoyed, and appreciated, by me, because of that. These things that I am 'getting rid of', after my going through my entire apartment assessing the value of things to me, during my Spring Cleaning, will soon have their first real chance to be fulfilled in their purpose, by someone else who wants, and needs, exactly what they are, and have to offer. I am excited for their future. They will undoubtedly brighten someone's day, when they are discovered there! I pray that they will be "Just the thing that I need!" for the right people, that they should be with, and belong to.

Even if I might tear up, some, as I watch the Donations Pick-Up truck driving away with them.